After more than 20 years immigrating to the US and 10 years working as an official doctor in the US medical system, I have realized something extremely interesting and proud about the Vietnamese immigrant community.
On the surface, many of us start this journey with many disadvantages surrounding us:
- English is not perfect.
- The family was completely unfamiliar, not familiar with the local system.
- Does not possess strong social relationships.
- There is no one ahead to hold your hand and show you step by step.
- Even all the qualifications, experience and confidence that were built up in Vietnam… came here and suddenly had to be proven all over again.
However, the people who start from that negative line, after a few years, ten years, then twenty years… become extremely resilient individuals and very difficult to defeat.
They can do that not because they are tireless. It’s not because they’ve never shed tears in a dark corner. It’s not because they were already strong from the start.
Essentially, it’s because they’ve lived through it so many times that they had to clench their fists and tell themselves: “It’s okay. I’ll find another way.”
There is a special kind of strength that does not come from luck, but from the fact that even though life has been extremely difficult, we still choose to keep going. And I think that is one of the biggest “hidden advantages” of Vietnamese immigrants.
1. Vietnamese immigrants are used to starting all over again from the starting line
Not everyone is brave enough to endure the feeling that they used to be a capable and powerful person in their hometown, but when they moved to a new land, they suddenly turned into a completely “new person”.
- Completely new in everyday communication language.
- Completely new approach to cultural behavior.
- Completely new to the job application process.
- Completely new in the way the surrounding society evaluates one’s abilities.
That feeling of disappointment can easily sink people into self-esteem and confusion. But once you have bravely overcome that golden testing period, you will possess an extremely valuable ability: “No longer too afraid of having to start over.”
Rejection is painful, but it cannot kill your will.
- If I don’t know the knowledge, I proactively learn it.
- If the route goes the wrong way, I calmly correct it.
- If this door doesn’t open, I’ll persistently knock on another door.
A person who has rebuilt his whole life over and over again in a foreign country will never collapse easily just because of a few temporary failures.
2. Infinite endurance from years without the option of retreating
Many Vietnamese immigrants often do not have comfortable “safety cushions” in terms of finances or family background when they first come to America.
- There are not always relatives or relatives nearby to rely on.
- There is not always someone ahead to show the way.
- And they have absolutely no right to stop for too long to be sad, to be scared or to stand confused in the middle of the road.
Because the naked daily reality is: House rent, electricity and water bills are still due. Children are still required to have tuition money to go to school. And the business of making a living must continue to operate.
It sounds sad at first glance, but that situation with no way out has trained a very special type of endurance.
It is a kind of power that is not noisy, not ostentatious, and does not require anyone to stand outside and applaud. It simply shows up in the following: The next morning they still wake up on time, still go to work, still take care of their families and silently find a solution to thoroughly solve each problem that arises.
During my 10 years as a doctor in the US, I had the opportunity to interact with and treat many people like that. They carry within themselves a long chapter full of storms, but when they sit down to tell the doctor about it, they share it with a very calm, gentle attitude as if it were just “life, it’s nothing”. And I really respect that kind of deep inner strength.
3. Instinct forced to adapt quickly to the complex American system
For a new settler, American society initially operates like a confusing maze with a series of complex systems: From the health insurance system, tax law, credit score, school system, job application process, office culture, to skills for building professional social relationships.
To be able to survive and thrive in this environment, Vietnamese immigrants are required to turn on the observation and learning mode extremely quickly:
- In this environment, what do Americans really value?
- What are the actual written laws, and what are the hidden rules that need to be subtly recognized?
- When is it necessary to stay humble, and when is it necessary to have the courage to speak up?
- When is it necessary to work harder, and when is it necessary to think in the right place?
Because in America, hard work is a necessary condition, but hard work alone is absolutely never enough. If you blindly work hard and refuse to understand how the system operates, you will easily have this cycle erode both your health and spirit.
4. Strategic advantage when viewing life through two cultural lenses
The journey of living at the intersection of two cultures will sometimes make us feel lost: Returning to Vietnam, we find that our thinking has many different parts, but living in America, sometimes we still feel like we don’t completely belong here.
However, the longer I travel, the more I realize that this precarious state is actually a huge strategic advantage if you know how to take advantage of it:
- We deeply understand the sacred values of intimacy of an Asian family, but at the same time we also absorb and learn how to set personal boundaries in a civilized way of Americans.
- We understand the virtue of humility, but we can also practice the American mindset of fairness: If we do well without proactively talking about our own abilities, others will default to not seeing our value.
- We appreciate the sacrifices of our parents, but also understand the modern mindset that a child is an independent entity, and does not necessarily have to live a forced life to complete the unfinished dream of their parent.
Standing between two cultural flows has never been easy. But it gives you an invaluable asset: The ability to look at a problem from many different perspectives. And a person who possesses multidimensional thinking will always be more flexible, less extreme, and never be imprisoned by circumstances into a single, deadlocked way of thinking.
5. Possessing reasons and motivation big enough to never give up
Most Vietnamese who immigrated to America did not just live and fight for themselves.
- They study hard not just to get a prestigious degree.
- They work hard not only to make money to pay basic living bills.
- They accumulate and buy houses not just to own a simple physical asset.
Behind them is always the silhouette of their elderly parents, the future of their children, their responsibility to their family, and a burning desire: To help the next generation have more good and open choices than the previous generation.
That is both a heavy pressure on the shoulders, but at the same time a huge source of motivational fuel.
When you understand that the bumpy road you are on is not just serving your own selfish ego, your body will automatically activate an infinite endurance: You may be tired, but it is absolutely not easy to give up; You may be a little scared, but will still be resilient in finding a solution; You may feel lost, but your feet will still firmly move forward.
Conclusion
After more than two decades of experiencing life in America, I no longer view this settlement journey through two simple, one-sided lenses: “suffering” or “happiness”. Its nature is much more complex and profound than that.
There are silences of loss, loneliness, moments of self-deprecation, and times when you feel so small in front of an operating system that is so huge.
- But along with those challenges comes an extremely beautiful transformation process:
- Learn how to turn initial disadvantages into inner bravery.
- Turn the lack of resources into the ability to manage and adapt flexibly.
- Turn the feeling of being lost into a more open, tolerant perspective.
- Turn heavy pressure into a strong source of motivation to break through.
And turn those times when you have to accept starting over again into a firm belief that: As long as you are still breathing, you will definitely be able to continue.
So, if you are a Vietnamese living in the US, or are preparing to embark on this immigration journey, you absolutely should not just stare at the pieces of the puzzle that you are missing.
Learn to look at the priceless assets you already possess: You have endurance forged through hardship; You have the instinct to adapt quickly; you have a rich experience of living between two worlds; and you have extremely great reasons not to stop.
Vietnamese immigrants achieved success in America not at all because their lives encountered many easy things. They are successful because they have learned how to stand up courageously after each time life knocks them down.
What do you think about these contemplations of mine? On your journey to settle down and develop yourself in the US, what has given you the greatest strength? Please leave a comment below the article to discuss with me.
If you feel this article brings spiritual values and useful perspectives, please share it widely with relatives and friends living in the US or about to go to the US!
Dr. Christina Nguyen
Phoenix Medical Academy
